Owning your shit.

 

It is time to take responsibility for your life in its entirety. 

For all the excuses you use to deflect things from happening to you. 

It is time to own your life and own how you perceive life. 

Do you live in victim mode?

Do you blame other people or situations for things you don’t like or that aren’t as you expected? 

Do you make excuses that hold you back from actually achieving the thing you want to achieve? 

Are you forever saying “I would do it, if I had the time / money / confidence / headspace”

Do you dislike the situation you are in but think its not your responsibility to get yourself out of it? Maybe it’s where you live or the job you are in or your children’s behaviour. 

Do you feel like you are owed something? From the government, from your family, friends or peers? 

IT’S ALL BULLSHIT. 

 

I used to live like this. I used to believe I had drawn the short straw and ended up with all the shit life could throw at me. 

I have been abandoned, abused, bullied, homeless, left when pregnant, laughed at, manipulated, cheated on, depressed and failing as a mum.

I have hearing loss, joint hyper mobility syndrome, arthritis at 32, PMDD, a son with autism who suffers with anxiety and hyper-mobilty. 

I felt like the NHS weren’t doing enough, I felt like I deserved to be housed in better accommodation, like I wasn’t getting enough help from the government or those around me. I felt like all of this was happening TO ME and dragging me down into a black, lonely pit of shit. I WAS SO ALONE. 

So people ask me “Emma how are you smiling and thriving? Even still as a single mum with all the above ailments very much present?

Well its not been plain sailing, lemme tell ya!

Grab your fave drink, get comfy and gather round the fire….

____________________________

I lived in victim mode for most of my life up until about 3 years ago. I couldn’t see a way out of the shit storm clouding around me. 

I was working part time in a garage, living in a grimy flat in a questionable neighbourhood with a son who beat ten bails of shit out of me and screamed the place down EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. 

I haven’t had the easiest of pasts and I held onto that fairly tightly wondering “why me? how have I ended up like this, I’m sure I was destined for better.”

I had been left a single mum whilst pregnant and my son was growing up to be unbearably naughty, not like a ‘normal’ child naughty but something else! I had failed as a mum! I knew he was different but others didn’t believe me when I explained. I later discovered he has autism, Asperger Syndrome and these outbursts were in fact sensory overloads. 

I could NOT live like this. THIS wasn’t living. THIS was surviving. 

I DECIDED to do something about it. Searched for answers, for ways out. Educate myself, learn how to deal with all this. Although my head was so busy and chaotic, I was exhausted and broke, I was scared of taking steps forward, I didn’t know how to change my life but I KNEW in the pit of my ginger soul that I needed my life back. 

This cold hearted, autopilot, numb shell of a human opened her closed, cobwebbed mind and asked for help. 

Help came in the form of a mentor. I was sick to my stomach when I handed over the many £££ to begin my journey into the unknown. BLINDLY THROWING MY NON EXISTENT MONEY AWAY was what my niggling mind was saying. 

But blow me down, was this the best investment I have ever made! Not only did my coach help me to strategise my business ideas, she opened my mind to possibilities of a better way of living. The curious soul that I am, went off to explore further and the more I read and learned, the more my perception of life started to shift. 

The biggest monumental shift was in my parenting. I saw everything from a different perspective, from many perspectives in fact! BUT I was the one who had to change to make this relationship with my son work. I needed to understand how his little ASD brain is wired and shift my parenting to suit him and his additional needs. WHAT A DIFFERENCE! He went from angry, emotional & overwhelmed to loving, open and creative. This will always be my greatest achievement which I work on every day. Consistency is key 

Once I had a grasp on my parenting, it gave me energy to leave my unfulfilling job and start my entrepreneurial journey. And what a journey it has been so far, every evolving and growing. I have had the absolute pleasure to help others change their perception of themselves and their lives & abilities. I have helped them to grow in business and in self. Coaching and teaching is absolutely my calling in life, it is the must fulfilling thing for me and I’m SO grateful that all of my experiences have lead me here. 

Having been through the muddiest waters, experienced pain and loss, lived through anxiety and stress enables me to connect on a deeper level with my clients. For this I am grateful. 

As cliche as it sounds, I believe that we can all achieve growth, inner peace and joy. In whatever form that is personal to you. 

What your are experiencing now is your perception of life, through then lens of your experiences and conditioned beliefs. You know that little voice in the back there, yep that one that you suppress and try to ignore. The one that questions the way you live, wonders if this is it, wants to know if you can change the current situation. I invite you to listen to that voice, to hear what it has to say, to connect with your intuition and make the first step towards growth. 

Sceptic or not, this Universe is bigger, more intelligent and so very connected yet we choose to live in a closed minded, safe place and choose not to grow out of fear. Now is your chance to take responsibility for who you are and what you want your life to look like. 

I challenge you to spend one day being grateful for all that you have experienced, for all you have around you down to the clothes on your back. Cast no blame, no negative self talk, live in the moment and see everything around you. Just for one day, or at least one hour if you cant make it the day. Write it down, breathe and really listen to your intuition. 

If you feel connected or if this resonated with you, please reach out and share your experience with me. I genuinely want to know how you feel. 

With Gratitude & Love

Em xx